Doing It All
I have my own theory on being a woman who wants it all called the "Roxy 80". It simply means that there is no way in hell to do absolutely everything you want to do 100% well so learn to be satisfied with 80%.
It sounds like an obvious plan but when you think about it there are so many important categories in a women's life. For me my relationship with my husband comes first. If that's good it sets up the foundation for everything else. Then come our two children. But work is a must to provide new challenges. And there is no way I want to sacrifice my health for the sake of being successful so that too is important. Also if I don't have adventure in my life it's the end. I need to feel like I'm living like I've never lived. It defines who I am. Then there are other things like finances, aging parents...
That's a lot of stuff to do well isn't it? I can assure you first hand that my life falls apart when I strive for 100% in any one of these categories. So I made a major mental shift to allow myself to be completely satisfied. Okay you got me. I'm still "making" the shift. It's like being part of AA. I've admitted that I'm working on this horribly hard task. The Roxy 80 rule is my break-through answer to this issue. My husband seems to think this rule is perfect for me since I turn the little things like taking up a new hobby into preparing for the Olympics. Last year, I decided surfing was going to be my new thing. Less than a month into it I was in classes, going to camps, reading books, videos, owned a board and wetsuit, and was just short of booking a session with World Professional Layne Beachley. Today he only needs to say "surfing" and I get that he's trying to say bring it to 80 for the sake of everything else.
I'm not the only one who thinks they're doing it all. I had a very funny email exchange with my husband's boss recently that turned into us revealing exactly what was on our minds. Here's the punch...
Hal: Why, just today we [Hal and my husband] were discussing the fun of fighting for our careers in an increasingly dangerous corporate environment, yet somehow continuing to provide for our families until we're 65. No pressure. Then we get to enjoy those last two years of stress-free life before we die in pain of some kind of cardiac thrombosis.
And when we come home our work doesn't stop. Oh, no, then we just become instant house-husbands, cooking and cleaning and child-minding until late because the little woman has somehow, inexplicably, exhausted herself in the 12 hours we were away and the kids were at school and aftercare, and now it's somehow our turn. Where's the logic in that?
Geez, I'm so glad I'm a man. Also interesting: While one can't needle one's own wife, one can needle someone else's. (I said needle.)
Roxy: For your information, Jack receives dinner on the table, daily massages, regular blow jobs, sex, someone to handle all of the kid's aliments and a wife working on making millions to support the entire family for life... so who's work never stops?
Hal: You've got to give him blow jobs? You win hands down.
Like I said...
I have my own theory on being a woman who wants it all called the "Roxy 80". It simply means that there is no way in hell to do absolutely everything you want to do 100% well so learn to be satisfied with 80%.
It sounds like an obvious plan but when you think about it there are so many important categories in a women's life. For me my relationship with my husband comes first. If that's good it sets up the foundation for everything else. Then come our two children. But work is a must to provide new challenges. And there is no way I want to sacrifice my health for the sake of being successful so that too is important. Also if I don't have adventure in my life it's the end. I need to feel like I'm living like I've never lived. It defines who I am. Then there are other things like finances, aging parents...
That's a lot of stuff to do well isn't it? I can assure you first hand that my life falls apart when I strive for 100% in any one of these categories. So I made a major mental shift to allow myself to be completely satisfied. Okay you got me. I'm still "making" the shift. It's like being part of AA. I've admitted that I'm working on this horribly hard task. The Roxy 80 rule is my break-through answer to this issue. My husband seems to think this rule is perfect for me since I turn the little things like taking up a new hobby into preparing for the Olympics. Last year, I decided surfing was going to be my new thing. Less than a month into it I was in classes, going to camps, reading books, videos, owned a board and wetsuit, and was just short of booking a session with World Professional Layne Beachley. Today he only needs to say "surfing" and I get that he's trying to say bring it to 80 for the sake of everything else.
I'm not the only one who thinks they're doing it all. I had a very funny email exchange with my husband's boss recently that turned into us revealing exactly what was on our minds. Here's the punch...
Hal: Why, just today we [Hal and my husband] were discussing the fun of fighting for our careers in an increasingly dangerous corporate environment, yet somehow continuing to provide for our families until we're 65. No pressure. Then we get to enjoy those last two years of stress-free life before we die in pain of some kind of cardiac thrombosis.
And when we come home our work doesn't stop. Oh, no, then we just become instant house-husbands, cooking and cleaning and child-minding until late because the little woman has somehow, inexplicably, exhausted herself in the 12 hours we were away and the kids were at school and aftercare, and now it's somehow our turn. Where's the logic in that?
Geez, I'm so glad I'm a man. Also interesting: While one can't needle one's own wife, one can needle someone else's. (I said needle.)
Roxy: For your information, Jack receives dinner on the table, daily massages, regular blow jobs, sex, someone to handle all of the kid's aliments and a wife working on making millions to support the entire family for life... so who's work never stops?
Hal: You've got to give him blow jobs? You win hands down.
Like I said...
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